Writing a blog can sometimes be frustrating, as you bloggers can understand. What will we write about? Who is our audience? What do we want to say to keep things interesting? And can we adequately tell the subject from two different points of view? Being the one with the rose-colored glasses, as my husband frequently points out, I want to keep things on the light side. Who wants to hear about Debbie Downer issues?
But realistically, everything is not always sunshine, lollipops and rainbows, to quote an old Lesley Gore song (yea, yea, I’m old!). As a matter of fact, I have a few pet peeves. Really! A big one used to be drivers in the left lane. Surely everyone knows to pass and then get back into the right lane. Yea, no. And people in the 15-items-or-less checkout line with 30 items! C’mon! But I think my biggest pet peeve, which I kind of borrowed from my husband, are those drivers who WON’T DO THE SPEED LIMIT. People! How can you not even do the speed limit?! Argh! It just makes me crazy.
Which leads me to another topic: CONSIDERATION. What a concept! It’s sometimes really hard to be considerate, isn’t it? Especially with inconsiderate people, ha ha! When Allison and I talked about this we both had our lists. But the more we talked, the mellower we became. If you stop to think about it (hard to do when you are angry) you never know where someone is at. Their being inconsiderate is simply a reflection of their current mindset. I’ve been there: self-absorbed, just worrying about what’s going on in my own life and not really thinking about others. So! I’m going to practice my deep breathing exercises more that I learned long ago when I got a speeding ticket (no need to speed; you’ll catch the person at the next light. Just relax!). I need to get back to regular yoga. That seems to help. And mostly realize that everyone is at a different place, so along with consideration is tolerance. Maybe we could just spread a little more of that!
When mom and I were thinking about what we wanted to write about this week, and she brought up pet peeves I was like “Oh ya! I’ve got PLENTY of those!” Especially since I’ve been out and about more lately, trying to finish up those doctor’s appointments, dentist visits, trips to and from school to drop off supplies (basically being back around people again). I am so surprised sometimes by the lack of consideration of other people! I have to tell myself that they are probably NOT trying to be a jerk by waiting until the LAST minute to get out of (or into) the turn lane. I’m working really hard on this thing called “Grace”. Working REALLY hard on assuming the best about people instead of automatically thinking the worst (ie- maybe they JUST got a phone call that they have to go visit their sick grandmother and this is where they have to turn vs. wow what a selfish jerk, acting like he’s too good to wait in line with the rest of us!)
Assuming the best of people, and showing grace, goes along with my ever-long quest to “model”. Model appropriate behavior for not only my kids, but strangers as well. It’s funny how fast a mood can be contagious. Just the other night at dinner Brodie spilled his milk. Jeff instantly snapped at him, and Brodie started crying (yes, literally crying over spilled milk!). Not 10 minutes later, Kendall did something to Brodie and he instantly yelled at her. Now, I’m not saying they don’t fight, but they generally get along pretty well. Which is why she was so surprised that he yelled at her for something that wasn’t really that big of a deal. So of course she hit him, then ran off to her room. I watched all this thinking, “wow. Now I have to go talk to him about being kind, her about hitting, as well as calm them both down.” But how did it really start? By Jeff snapping at him for spilling his milk. If he had shown Brodie grace, and helped him clean up the mess, they could have gotten right back to dinner, no harm no foul (maybe…) But instead, as soon as Brodie got snapped at he got defensive and took it out on the next person, his sister. (Not to say that I blame Jeff for the way he reacted. I do it ALL THE TIME. This just happened to be one of those times I wasn’t involved, and could step back and watch how things played out…)
So when you’re frustrated at ALL those people in the world that seem to have NO idea that they’re not the only ones on this Earth, take a deep breath, and try to show them some grace. You have no idea what they’re going through. And if showing grace isn’t easy at that moment, at least curse them out in your head instead of out loud….
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